Remembering to Breathe

I took these photos at SGI just a few meters outside my office door in a busy metropolitan neighborhood. They remind me of the simplicity of life and also the work required to make things grow well.

Dave’s big on spiritual disciplines. I’m so-so. I think they’re vital and good and worthy of time and devotion, but I’ve never really implemented them in my life. However, for the past several months I have developed the habit of praying for the day as soon as I get in my car and pull out of our parking area.  This by no means makes me more spiritually mature than anyone else, but I need this time to set my focus for the day and to remember what really matters.  When I don’t do this, my mood quickly goes sour.

The life-giving nature of this routine prayer greatly helped me the other day as I pulled up to the Solid Ground gate at 6:15 a.m., my usual arrival time. Before I even opened the gate, two residents met me outside with a problem. There was a relatively easy fix to the problem, but I wasn’t positive if it would work so I didn’t offer any solution at the gate. Breathe in and out, I told myself. It’s not a big deal.

Then I walked to my office and opened my door where another problem sat waiting for me on my desk. I called the two concerned residents to the office to discuss it and even had to get a staff member’s input about the situation. Not the end of the world. A good lesson for all.

Then I got a text from a staff member at the other SGI house and discovered that a resident didn’t come home the night before, a third time offense. As the staff revealed more of the story, I genuinely became concerned for her safety. Fortunately, our social worker reached out to her and the resident assured us she was safe but not ready to come home yet. Wait patiently and hope for the best outcome.

And then I had to confront a resident about some sticky, sensitive issues and she did not like what I had to say, even though she agreed with it all. I asked her to please disagree with me and to help me understand the other side of the issue, but she said there was no other side. Except that the heart wants what it wants.

All this before 9:00 a.m. The day tarried on with resolutions to some situations appearing little by little while other issues were left unresolved and new issues appeared. The heart issues aren’t easily resolved because there are layers of guilt, scar tissue, desires, and dreams mixed with the present reality of school, work, and responsibility. It’s life disorganized. Still healing.

I love the messiness of working with these women during this time in their lives.  My routine morning prayer stabilizes me so that I don’t over or underreact.  When life, glorious life, is abounding in our midst, our habits should point us heavenward.